Cody's Totally Awesome Picks That Are Way Better Than Jeremy's Stupid Spiral Notes Picks

Last week: 10-6
ATS: 9-7
Season totals: 31-16
Season ATS: 27-20

Not a great week for the Codemeister but above average nonetheless. I've just got to pick the favorites every time like my counterpart and I'd be fine. I digress (in Speed Week fashion cuz my library comp time will run out soon...FUCK!!!!!):

Minnesota (1-2) at Tennessee (3-0)
I'm not buying this whole Tennesse craze. They have a leper at quarterback, somebody I haven't even heard of the guy at running back and their D is overrated. Vikings 24, Titans 23.

San Francisco (2-1) at New Orleans (1-2)
Drew Brees can suck on my bowwllllsaacckkk for sucking it up in the first few weeks, but he'll put his head out eventually. Aints 34, Niners 27

Green Bay (2-1) at Tampa Bay (2-1)
I wanted to lay down a fun ticket on the Pack, but a wise old sage once told me never to bet with my heart. Turns out that sage is a moron. Pack 21, Bucs 13

Houston (0-2) at Jacksonville (2-1)
Big spread, but the Texans suck something awful. Jags 27, Tex 2

Denver (3-0) at Kansas City (0-3)
Diabetes or not, Jay Cutler can throw the damn ball. Broncs 38, Chefs 6

Arizona (2-1) at N.Y. Jets (1-2)
Brett continues to plummet. Damnit. Cards 23, Jets 21

Atlanta(2-1) at Carolina (2-1)
The Falcs blow five gay dudes when Turner can't run. Seems pretty simple: Don't let Turner run. Panthers 17, Falcs 13

Cleveland (0-3) at Cincy (0-3)
Nobody outside of Ohio gives a shit. Cincy 13, Cleveland 7

Washington (2-1) at Dallas (3-0)
I hate Dallas, and yet, I strangely can't pick against them. Fags 38, Skins 17 (I'm on a homophobic kick this week)



Buffalo (3-0) at St. Louis (0-3)
The charade will end once the Bills play somebody worth a damn. That's not this week. Bills 28, Rams 17

Philly (2-1) at Chicago (1-2)
Finally a game worth talking about and I don't have time. Shit. Eagles 20, Da Bears 13

Baltimore (2-0) at Pittsburgh (2-1)
Willis McGahee's vagina...global warming...Matt Damon...(mind running out of things to say under pressure) Steelers 13, Ravens 7