Soccerball World Series Footie Match

ENNAAAAAAAAAKOOOO!

Now that's out of the way, I've got to give my propers to Diego Maradona. Because of that's crazy coked-up bastard's bold statement to run through the streets in the buff if Argentina were to win the cup, the flood gates have opened up for celebs/models/porn actresses to put on similar exhibitions.

Top-heavy Paraguayan model Larissa Riquelme promised to run through the streets of Paraguay naked if the South American team won the cup. Despite the team failing to pull off an upset of Spain last week, she decided she'll do it anyways. God bless her.

Not that I'll be watching or anything...

Not to be outdone, Dutch porn princess Bobbi Eden and her friends have decided to...umm....knob off all of her twitter followers if Holland pulls off an upset of Spain on Sunday. For the general health of all Netherlanders, let's hope Spain wins. I'm gonna go ahead and not google image search Eden considering I'm on my work computer right now.

And now on to my final breakdown nuggets/predictions:
1. My boy David Villa is going to win the Golden Boot. He is currently tied with Wesley 'Get Off The' Sneijder with five goals, but I'm expecting to see a Villa tie breaker in the footie world series on Sunday. The Spanish reverted to a 4-5-1 for the German game, presumably to quell the ambitious German attack, and the result was a lone goal. I'm expecting boss man Vicente del Bosque to revert back to the 4-4-2 that got them so many looks throughout the tournament. That'll open Villa up for a couple nylon-finding opportunities. As for Sneijder, going up against the Spanish defense is no easy feat and he won't get too many chances. I think he'll get blanked.

*I'm still holding out hope that my other favorite player, el capitan beefcake Diego Forlan of Uruguay, can somehow work his way into the mix for the top scorer award, but against Germany that's wishful thinking.

2. Speaking of the third place game, I'm in agreeance with Ro. You just lost in the semifinal of the world cup. Poor you. Wait, we have a consolation prize for you. You get to play one more game. No, no, it doesn't mean anything. No, you don't get a shiny prize if you win it. You just get to play one more match for shits and giggle. Fuck that noise. Just let them go silently into the night.

That being said, the Jabulani-bending Forlan is involved so I will of course be tuning in on Saturday. It should be an offense-laden slice of heaven.

3. American announcers/color commentators suck a flavorful bag of crap. ESPN and the like should leave the announcing up to the pros. God knows what John Harkes is ever talking about. As for Alexi Lalas, I'd be happy enough never hearing that man speak again. I love me some Ruud Gullitt though. He and Tshabalala or whatever the South African's name is can stay (racist?).

4. I tell you, the real winner in this tournament is the country of South Africa. Every time I come here it gets harder to leave. I think you put something in the water. Excuse me, I've got to go play some golf.

5. Dutch Dip. With the obvious exception being Brazil, the charismatic Dutch have had a relatively easy road thus far. Still, they've dominated when they were supposed to (albeit with flops and bitching). With Arjen Robben and Dirk Kuyt leading the charge up front and the wily Sneijder coming up as an attacking mid, Netherlands has quite a few more attacking options than Spain. They'll need every last one of them too because the Spanish duo of Pique and Carles Puyol has been nearly impenetrable, allowing only a single goal after the opening-game debacle against the Swiss.

On the flip side, Spain's offense has been way too singular and reliant on Villa. The pacy forward has carried The Red Fury at times this tournament, but they'll need more than just him to be on point when attacking the Dutch. Time and time again, Spain has just settled for another pass when wide open shots presented themselves. Specifically, Iniesta and Xavi have to take a damn shot when they have the opportunity in the box. Holland will be back at full strength in the final, with defender Gregory van der Wiel and defending midfielder Nigel de Jong fresh off suspensions. They'll need their best to avoid lapses against the pass-happy Spanish.

I've going to go against the grain on this one. I think the Dutch are going to pull off the upset with goals from Robben and Kuyt. Villa will get his, but it won't be enough. And if they do, I'm going to streak through the streets of Carlsbad. I think that's a sight that everyone would love to see. [=~)